Stuff Megan Does Not Like (Part Three)

I do not like snakes. 

It is not that I think snakes are evil (although I do think snakes are evil), it is just that I do not trust anything that lacks both arms and legs and is able to dislocate its own jaw. Don’t get me wrong, I admire the kind of dedication it takes to dislocate one’s own jaw in order to eat something delicious; it is just that snakes give me the heebie-jeebies. 

Do you think snakes ever get dizzy because of the way in which they need to move from side to side in order to achieve forward momentum? 

I once watched this video of a squirrel that was very angry with a snake. I can only assume that the snake had made an attempt to eat the squirrel. Understandably, this was something that the squirrel did not enjoy. In order to indicate to the snake that this was not an appropriate initial introduction, the squirrel decided it would bite the snake. Repeatedly. Just when it appeared the squirrel had finished biting the snake, the rambunctious little rodent would come back for more. Once the snake had lost a substantial amount of blood and slithered out on to the road, the squirrel, deciding that its message had been received, departed. 

Sometimes snakes get inside of my house. When this happens, I have found the best way to handle the situation is to jump on some sort of piece of furniture that is elevated from the floor, point at the snake and say, “Eghhhhhhaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh,” until someone else comes to usher the snake out of the house. I am not saying this is how all people should handle unwelcome visits from snakes, I am just saying that this is the method that works for me.


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